I was asked how I used to parent if it wasn’t “like this”.

I don’t think that I really had a “method” four years ago. I just reacted. I hadn’t been a yeller, never spanked.. I found infancy to be pretty easy minus the “will never let me put him down” and “Does not sleep before two years old” stuff. But as my child was growing out of infancy into “a child” his behavior was starting to get on my nerves and I was viewing his actions through the words that other people provided.

People say that children are manipulative. So when my child cried I would get annoyed that he was trying to change things…. When he was simply HAVING FEELINGS about something.

People say that children are destructive. So when he took something apart I viewed it as destruction instead of curiosity.

People say that children are careless. So when he broke the little red frog (story here: https://nurshable.com/2012/06/19/red-frog/ ) I viewed it as careless rather than realizing immediately that I had startled him and that he was being extremely careful.

Children are not convenient. That’s what people really want to say. They want to make kids be convenient.

Kids are independent human beings that have immature brains and bodies and that are still trying to piece together how and why things work.

I’m not a naturally patient person. I’ve always tended toward the sarcastic/negative outlook and towards being quick to judge and react.

Over the past four years I’ve become extremely different from how I have been most of my life.

It’s been work. But I believe in hard work. I believe that we each have the ability to change and to grow and to become better people and better parents.