Latest Posts
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The Whispers of Your Heart
Dear New Mama, I once was you. Scared and new. Looking for direction where no direction seemed to be. Everyone said different things, and the things that they said didn’t seem to match what my instincts called out for me… Continue reading
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Out-Tantruming a Tantrum is a Silly Notion
The only path to peace is through making the personal choice to be peaceful. I can’t out-tantrum your tantrum. I can’t out-hit your hit. I can’t shame you into being any less sad or any less angry. That is suppression.… Continue reading
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Cooperation and Compliance are Not the Same Thing
When people talk about a child being “uncooperative” it can often be helpful to consider that cooperation and compliance aren’t the same thing. Cooperation is working together towards a mutual goal. If one person does not share your goal it’s… Continue reading
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“How to Discipline a Tantruming Child”. Wait. What? Discipline Feelings?
I’ve drifted pretty far away from conventional approaches to tantrums. I simply see them as emotional reactions. Disappointment, sadness, frustration, overwhelm, over stimulation, confusion, over tiredness, hunger, fear, an inability to parse words into sentences, an inability to vent a… Continue reading
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Learning to Let Out the Feelings in a Safe Place at 2.5
Upset, she hits the air in front of me, then pulls her hand back and holds onto it. She looks miserable. I hold my arms out in an offering. She stomps one inch closer instead of stomping away. I envelope… Continue reading
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Manipulation is a Cloth Woven From Ordinary Feelings Warped by Bad Guesses
Dear Kids, A random ordinary thing happens in our lives. You react. With joy, with glee, with sadness, with anger, with fear, with uncertainty, with hesitation, with upset, with confusion, with jealousy, with assertiveness, with argumentativeness, with a refusal to… Continue reading
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Mondays and the Transition Back to the Week
He wiggles into bed next to me. I smile. This is a part of our daytime routine that I love. Then he growls the way he does when he’s really angry. And he pokes me in the face twice. “MOMMY.… Continue reading
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The Misrepresentations of a Spanking Culture
At the grocery store. The two year old is walking and the four year old wants to ride in the cart. They want to buy many different things. “That is not on the list.” I say. “What IS on the… Continue reading
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Pre-Teaching About Dangerous Objects That We Use Every Day
“What about situations where natural consequences are unacceptable”? I teach about the object before the child approaches the object. Knives, for example. Here’s a picture of me peeling potatoes with two toddlers and a four year old. I don’t do… Continue reading
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He Had a Bad Day.
He had a bad day. I could see it on his face as he walked off the bus. “How was your day?” I asked. “I don’t want to talk about that.” So I let it go. Then when he was… Continue reading
Nurshable 